Dealing with FearSimon Ralph
Fear seems be a constant companion for most of us these days. It’s become so part and parcel of our lives, that without it, life would seem very strange indeed. Yet, when it comes, it creates the havoc of anxiety and doubt, sabotaging our joy, enthusiasm and determination, resulting in poor attitudes and performance, not to mention a plethora of health issues.
Everything seems to be set up for us to experience fear; there are always the constant warning bells, admonishments of…. if you do or don’t do this, it will hurt you, burn you, kill you etc. It’s interesting to note that most of these ifs, buts, don’ts and shoulds, are not what’s actually occurring, but they are all about what might occur. Yes, of course, we have genuine fears, but on close examination most are imaginary. Maybe we can see fear as:
Fantasized Experiences Appearing Real
We then keep hold of and develop these fears and they eventually transform into beliefs and personality quirks.
Maybe, as Theodore Roosevelt famously stated, “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself, nameless, unreasoning, unjustified terror, which paralyzes needed effort”.
So to bring ourselves and our lives back to the clear and open water of mental peace and clarity, it’s urgent that we rid ourselves of this insidious virus that completely blots out the sunlight of joy and well-being.
My take is that these fears, these obstacles, are like wild animals – and they’re actually cowards, who will bluff you, if they can, to see if you are afraid, and they will try to spring up at you. But, if you look at them in the eye, will slink away out of sight.
It’s like the child who thinks there is a goblin behind the curtain, but, on turning on the light, sees the goblin is really a teddy bear. In the same way, when we shine the light of observation and awareness on our fears, they become something else.
So, let’s face our fears, reappraise and transform them by:
Facing, Ending, Answering, Responding
With this in mind, we can explore and experience various ways to effectively move us away from our numerous fears. Affirmations of intent and awareness talk directly to our subconscious which holds the fear. Affirmations really work for us. Try this three step approach.
“Happily, I let go of past fears and failures, and I embrace new learning and understanding as I move forwards, towards wisdom”
1. Read through the affirmation, acknowledging and accepting its message.
2. Now read again, but this time, read with feeling, experiencing the vibration and energy that the statements evoke within you.
3. Integrate the affirmation’s intention, absorb it, become it; hold the feeling and emotion.
(Practice this three step approach over a 5 minute period of time, actively observing the process, and then let go. This can be repeated each day to help to re-programme our subconscious, and move away from fear.)
Fear is, most probably, our number one biggest enemy. Fear is the single most restricting force we are influenced by in these times. Our lives are often lived on the basis of fear. This may sound harsh, but if we were to look at our lives objectively, what is our biggest motivator?
Would it be abundance or scarcity?
Which one drives us to go on?
Is it knowing that our lives will be full of everything we need, or is it the fear of not having enough?
Enough money, enough time, enough love, enough freedom…?
Fear is paralysing. It freezes us in our tracks. Fear stops us from enjoying or achieving our hopes and dreams, and drains away our power. That is, our power over ourselves, not over others.
When fear is present, the ability to make the right decision is clouded or completely blocked. Fear distorts our views and erodes our self-confidence.
When it comes to creativity, fear is a huge obstacle. It empties the soul of light, and fills it with darkness and despair.
These are reasons enough to make us realise that we need to relax our fearful minds.
Excerpt taken from the forthcoming book,
How to Relax Your Mind –The 10 Best Ways
By Jim Ryan and Simon Ralph