Happiness is quite difficult to define, yet, most people are aware of whether they are happy or not. Certainly happiness is not pleasure, which is fleeting: parties, receiving a gift, a day on the beach, or, as bidden by myths of the consumerist world, the accumulation of things that we run after to recreate imagined bliss. Chasing pleasure is not happiness. Happiness is a feeling of contentment, when your life is just as it should be, when your life fulfils all its needs. So what are our needs? What does it take to achieve happiness?

You can be happy, you should be happy and you can choose to be happy.

The following suggestions will bring you into the sunlight of real inner happiness.

Being Your Self

There’s nothing more uncomfortable than wearing shoes that don’t fit. The same goes for identity. Copying behaviours or cloning what others are like just doesn’t work. Influenced by the culture of labels and personality, we try to make a composite personality, pieced together from those we admire, hoping it will open the doors to success and happiness. Unfortunately, when I’m not being myself, it soon becomes evident to all and sundry, and eventually to me also, that I’m a fake.

I have to tell myself, I am unique; I have ability, capability and talent. Those who have achieved happiness and success first believed in themselves. I can only be who I am. I can only play the cards that I am dealt. Happiness and contentment is based on this self-acceptance, being who I am, being real and authentic.

Life becomes immensely more comfortable and enjoyable when we are able to live with ourselves, sharing and speaking from our hearts about what we think and what we believe. Being who you are, very soon your real and authentic self begins to formulate, and you and the world soon discover that you are very special indeed.


On recalling times when we gave gifts, don’t we feel good? Wasn’t there something magical, as we watched the faces of those who received them? Giving makes us happier and healthier. Giving is the real receiving; we enjoy it, it activates all our body’s feel-good chemicals and emotions.

Do things for others, offer support and advice, make someone smile, pay a compliment, increase your acts of kindness whenever you can. Help someone who is struggling, let others know you care.

Giving can also include listening, giving others space and time to share. It is cooperating with another’s idea while putting yours on the back burner for the time being. Experiment in giving and watch the barometer of your happiness rapidly rise.


We live in a wonderful and beautiful world, yet, we spend most of our time unaware, nose down, like grazing sheep.

Take time out, look around, notice and appreciate the wonder of our world around us. Breathe, take in the incredible multiplicity of life forms, the colours, and fragrances. Look at the majestic trees, enjoy the smell of grass and coffee.

What happens then is that we move our focus away from concerns about the future, we stop dwelling on the past, thinking and worrying about the non-essential,  our spirits become lifted, and we are able to get more out of our day to day living. It becomes a different world; we see it is a different world. We begin to participate in life’s great joy.

Empowering Your Day

Getting through the day can be exhausting and stressful and just as it finishes and we’re seeing some light at the end of the tunnel, the spectre of the following day looms and all again is darkness. However, we can overcome this tread mill state, by changing our attitude and mind-set, whereby, our day becomes one of value, learning and satisfaction.

Why not start the day by refreshing your mind, having some silence, filling yourself with light and energy, and with the positive intention that this day you will learn and experience new and wonderful things, that you will meet and connect with amazing and incredible people.

Empowering your day is also about recharging and renewing your depleted energies. Don’t wait until you’re running on near empty. Every hour take time out to go into silence for a few moments and to let go of everything and to experience yourself as a being of light and peace and love.

How we are in the morning has a lot to do with the night before. We often wake up in the morning just as exhausted as we were when we went to sleep. The thoughts, emotions and feelings of the interactions of the day are often still active in our subconscious as we sleep, continuing to drain us. We need to put them to sleep, to close them down. A few selected thoughts will do this just before sleep. “I separate myself from the thoughts and activities of the day. I let them all drift away in the soft stream of silence. There is now just a state of rest. I return to the world of peace and light, a state of freedom and release.”


“I smile, feel content and satisfied when I put the needs of others before my own.”


Except taken from How to Relax Your Mind – The 10 Best Ways,

written by Jim Ryan and Simon Ralph





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